Crowd-Funded Brewery Campaigns Are Bullshit

Crowd-funding is a great hustle. Remember a couple weeks ago when some dude threatened not to make potato salad unless we bought him a solid-gold pony with diamonds for eyes, and we actually went for it? Of course, many professional bloviators saw this as the exact moment when society’s collective handbasket… » 7/23/14 10:41am Today 10:41am

You're definitely in the minority on this Paul Pierce thing. I don't think he registers strongly positive or negative for most fans; he has a relatively low profile for a 50-time all-star who's been on national TV a billion times. I'm not disputing the Celtics overall loathsomeness, but I think your Paul Pierce beef… » 7/21/14 7:37pm Monday 7:37pm

Fast-Food Fight: Subway's Pulled Pork Vs. Wendy's Pretzel Bacon Burger

There are three main founts of greasy innovation whence spring the majority of new fast-food items. The bulk originate in the wide and shallow Same Shit, Different Condiments pool; they are joined by more ambitious offerings from the genres of Cynical Stunt Food and Honest-to-Ronald Attempts to Introduce Nice New… » 7/18/14 2:52pm Friday 2:52pm

The problem has traditionally been management smearing players who leave. This time it just seems like his teammates hated him, plus he sucked. I think there is a problematic pattern (calling Francona a pill head was particularly classy) but I'm not sure this is the same thing. If anything, AJ got a longish leash… » 7/10/14 10:03am 7/10/14 10:03am

All Shock, No Awe: 7-Eleven's Doritos Loaded, Reviewed

Are you repulsed by the idea of eating prepared food from a convenience-store chain most notable for a sludgy cold-sugar drink with the word "slurp" in the name? Are you fundamentally opposed to having your lunch heated in a machine also used to reinvigorate yesterweek's Go-Go Taquitos? Are you not magnetically… » 7/08/14 3:18pm 7/08/14 3:18pm

Big Mac Vs. Whopper: The Ultimate Burger Smackdown

It's been a rocky week for the USA. We were let down by our Supreme Court and our soccer team, and we head into a potentially hurricanous Independence Day licking our wounds and pondering our mistakes and just kidding, we fucking RULE, and that's partly due to geographic good fortune and relatively sound governance,… » 7/03/14 1:13pm 7/03/14 1:13pm

Citrus-Beer Smackdown: Bud Lite Lime Vs. Coors Light Summer Brew

These are boom times for the better-than-Bud beer-drinker. Last year, sales of craft beer—which I will never try to define, but which all warring factions of whiners and definers seem to agree means, at a bare minimum, "beer made in a less industrial fashion by smaller, independent, more quality-conscious… » 6/20/14 2:11pm 6/20/14 2:11pm

Taco Bell's Quesarito: A Fast-Food Love Affair Gone Awry

Hybrid foods are hit or miss. When they're honest attempts to expand the human dining experience by combining the virtues of two or more complementary yet previously segregated items, the results can be extraordinary. Pizza bagels, peanut butter cups, and Jell-O shots are classic examples of disparate foods joining… » 6/19/14 1:35pm 6/19/14 1:35pm

How To Make A Caipirinha, Brazil's Weird-Ass National Cocktail

I'm fired up for the World Cup, and you should be, too, even if you, like me, don't know shit about soccer. Or make that especially if you don't know shit about soccer. The beauty of The Most Popular Game on Earth™, at least for the open-minded neophyte, is that it's so breathtakingly easy to follow: a basic scoring… » 6/13/14 2:29pm 6/13/14 2:29pm

Snyder, Hernandez, Jeter, Simmons: based on severity of misdeed. Outside of "Hey, funny/nuts story!" I don't care if Jeter does steroids, and I feel the same about Simmons banging an intern. But Jeter has millions fans who SPECIFICALLY admire that he would never do steroids, whereas I don't think Simmons fans really… » 6/13/14 1:36pm 6/13/14 1:36pm